Sunday, April 09, 2006

randomunendingneverstoppingsentences.

I worry that I've lost my creative sensibilities. I have a lot of friends who write. And I think that's great. But I get a little bitter when I hear them talk about it or when I see an actual manuscript. I have no patience or attention span with which to write.

I used to fancy myself a creative person only I'm not so sure why I ever really thought that now. I can't seem to get truly creative thoughts out of my head and on paper. Not more than a couple sentences at least.

I think everyone knows about my book that I've been perpetually writing and deleting. I honestly think I have a creative and very workable idea. I certainly have a unique outlook on life. What I lack is the motivation to sit down and write it. I can't get thoughts out in an organized manner. Much like this blog entry, I start writing it and I have no idea where it goes.

I, personally, blame my education. Journalism teaches you to boil down what you're trying to say to it's most essential words. More words= wasted paper, wasted broadcast time, lost money and time. I spent 4 years boiling down flowery prose to a headline, a tag-line, a big idea, a unique selling proposition, etc. And now I feel like I've gotten to this point where I can't expound upon ideas. I can't unpackage thoughts and feelings and ideas I have and turn them into a creative expression.

What's happened to me?

Monday, April 03, 2006

Good better best, never let it rest.

I've decided a goal that I want to work dilligently toward is keeping my finances in check. Suze Orman had definitely motivated me to do so. I just made all my payments, balanced my checkbook and dried my eyes at just how little money I have. Tear. And to make matters worse, when I get paid next, I have to then pay car insurance (yuck), then wait until my next paycheck, fix my car (sick), then pay rent, student loans, credit cards... and that's before I even do ANYTHING fun.

Oh well, I just have to buckle down for a few months and get things paid for... then, the world is my oyster.